Influence Without Authority

• An interview is itself an exercise in influence without authority
• Junior employees
• Senior employees
• More experienced employees

This ability is needed at almost every stage.

how to ?

1. Listening
2. Empathy
3. Curiosity

Listening: Why listen? There are four listening situations; do not confuse them. (1) listen for appreciation: to appreciate (2) listen for comprehension: to understand (3) listen for empathy: to empathize (4) listen for evaluation: to assess the situation and problem Never confuse (3) with (4). Do not rush into (4) to prove your ability. Do (3) thoroughly before moving on to (4).

Do not say, I have this experience, so let me help you. Do not impose your help on others.

A leader cares about results, not whether you think you know how to do something. How can you help? Guide the other person? Use questions to guide their thinking: ask more, tell less?

Action plan:

1. Listen first
2. Ask questions

A leader’s goal is to get things done. The solution is something we discover together through conversation. Provide more context and explain the motivation.

Curiosity: do not try to persuade; inspire. The best way to persuade you is to help you arrive at the real solution yourself.

When you disagree, ask why the other person thinks that way. Curiosity is the prerequisite for a productive conversation.

Ego: trust your ability fully. You do not need to prove yourself or seek validation from within.

Storytelling: the STAR model

H: hook, provoke thought S: situation T: task A: action R: result

Do not fear conflict in negotiation. Start with no. Do not be afraid of the other person’s initial no; use it to understand what they really want.

How can you stop worrying about the other person’s rejection?